Those days you shirk your responsibilities…

… because sometimes you’re really overwhelmed with life, and you have death cramps from hell, and who wants to drive an hour to a four hour class?

So. I instead stayed in town, worked out, went grocery shopping, watched Gilmore Girls, cooked an amazing dinner, had a friend over for said dinner, and enjoyed my day. No regrets.

If I’m honest, my mind is elsewhere these days. Work is hard because I’m just not there mentally or emotionally anymore. I’ve already moved in my mind. Alas, two more months before that happens. I’m also not really here in this town. I’m just angsty, already moved on Samantha. Ready for the next place.

I’m glad handsome mister is applying to be in the air force. It will suit my wanderlust quite well. Moving every two to three years? Oh gosh, yes please. I’m so down for that. I get antsy if I stay in one place for too long. And this place has been TOO long. Mostly because of what happened here, not so much Oregon itself. Oregon is lovely, green, organic-friendly, paleo friendly, BUT, it’s imprinted with scars of yesteryear.  I know you can’t run away from problems, and actually, I’m not. The person I am now compared to the person I was a year ago is SO VERY DIFFERENT. I have a better handle on my anxiety and my life. If I’ve learned anything from my move from Rockaway Beach Oregon to Newberg Oregon is that no matter if you get away from THE place where something bad happened or THE people that caused you trauma, it sticks with you and you have to deal with it one way or the other.


In other news. I LOVE Gilmore Girls. It’s maybe an unhealthy obsession. I finished the final season again today and I sobbed forever. Ugh. Lorelai and Rory are just my absolute favorite characters that t.v. has ever produced. I also love that depending on my stage of life when I watch the show I root for different characters and different episodes hit me in new ways each watch through. Stars Hollow is a fantasy home in my mind and heart… I hope one day to live somewhere like it.

In OTHER news… I GOT MY JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE TICKETS IN THE MAIL. So, freaking, happy. Yeah. I haven’t seen Justin in concert since the Justified/Stripped tour with Christina Aguilera and Mr. Timberlake. It’s not until November but handsome mister and I have plans to rent a hotel in the city and spend a long weekend in PDX.

In other other news… since when did I get to be the age and stage of life where I’m planning things months in advance with a MAN who will be my HUSBAND?!



I’m lucky. And blessed. And ever so happy.

You know, when I’m not anxious and depressed. 😉

Good night world.


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